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Congrats Chicago, Now Choke on it

Our loss to Philly yesterday meant that for the first time in history, Chicago will win the Central Division.  Big friggin’ deal, right?  We’ve won the Division so many times it’s ridiculous.  But I’m pretty sure the bandwagon is getting awfully crowded in the Windy City.  They’re probably getting pretty excited knowing that they’ll be the highest seed in the Central even after next Sunday’s game against the Wings.  The Blackhawks “faithful” look at this…

…and are probably filled with pride.  But guess what?  In less than a week, that banner you just earned won’t mean diddly squat.  And you know what else?  You might be looking at taking us on in the first round.  Would the Chicago fans feel good about that?  Only the stupid ones.  Seeing as LA is only one point behind us with a game in-hand, we could very well drop to the seventh seed before this is over.  And if so?  It’s Chicago and Detroit in round one…and what a first round series that would be.

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I said it before, Chicago is secretly cheering us on.  Their fans won’t admit it, the players won’t ‘fess up.  But they need us to win.  They want us to take three out of our next three games and Nashville to lose both of theirs.  They don’t want us in round one, and if they do, they’re fox-trotting stupid.

So when Phoenix plays their back-up goalie against Nashville on Wednesday (because that’s what teams do, apparently), when Rick Nash puts his A-game on to face the Red Wings twice this week, Chicago is going to be watching very intently, secretly praying to the hockey gods for a Red Wings victory.

You don’t want us in round one, Chicago.  A first round exit would be devastating to your bandwagon.  Those contracts you signed this year?  They’re waiting for you at the end of this season…and they’re just aching to take a big wet bite out of your ass.  How much did you pay for Huet to ride the pine again?  It’s all or nothing for you this year, you went for broke.  And broke is where you’ll end up if the Wings take you on in the first round.

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All the beer you drink, and the cheering you do during the national anthem won’t save you from an embarassing and utterly crushing defeat in the first round if you draw the short straw and get Detroit in the first round.  You don’t want it.  Not even a little bit.

So beat your chest about your first ever Central title if you will.  Play the confidence card if you must.  But we all know that you’re shaking in your little moccasins…just a little bit at the notion that big brother may be waiting for you in Round One.

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